It has been a long, difficult week.
Personal updates…The Lupron Depot has kicked in full strength. It was semi-amusing to spend two full weeks wondering what a hot flash was. Well, now I know. But, the most debilitating part of this journey thus far has been the anxiety. My anxiety is worse than it has been in over a year. It is tough for me to get through most days without feeling like I am on the verge of falling apart. I am trying to avoid anxiety medication right now, so I am turning to natural remedies as much as possible. Meditation seems to be helping a bit. I am eating as well as I can, trying to drink more water, and exercising whenever possible. I keep reminding myself that this will not last forever. I am relying on faith to get me through the rough times. I have an appointment on Monday to find out if the Lupron is working at all. I am finding it tough to believe that the anxiety I am experiencing is normal. We’ll see what the doctor says. If anyone can spare any positive thoughts, I would so welcome them right now.
 |
| Boston Montage via Wikipedia |
In other news, I wanted to acknowledge the events that occurred in Boston. I know it has been awhile, but I haven’t blogged since it all happened. My connection to Boston, while it probably seems trivial to some, is important to me. I went to undergrad in Western Massachusetts, and my friends and I were in Boston every chance we got. I love Boston. I miss it. I see it in my dreams. L and I have even talked about moving there (a far off dream). I am keeping the people of Boston and the victims of this senseless, disgusting attack close to my heart. The stories of bravery, strength, and compassion that have come to light remind me of why I will always love this city that took really good care of a young, aimless LA girl who was thousands of miles away from home. I am forever grateful for that.
Jodi
Sorry about the increased anxiety. Since you are trying to avoid meds have your considered doing acupuncture? I did it after I was first dx w/ MS. I did it for fatigue, mood, etc. I loved it. It just got too expensive to keeping doing it. Also one of my friends did it while she was doing IVF and she has a healthy baby now. It was the only time it worked for her. This guy specializes in it for women w/ fertility problems. Very cool stuff.
Thanks for your Boston love! It was a yucky week but things are slowly getting back to some sense of normal
Vanessa
Continuing to send you positive thoughts and prayers! <3
-J.Darling
Hang in there! Sounds like you're actually doing a GREAT job managing it! Working out, taking care of you, and taking lots of deep breaths and meditating. Journaling would be the only thing that might be worth adding? It works well for some people, but for others, it causes them to dwell on their worries, rather than leave them on the page.
And, hey! If you need a side project, I could always use some help editing the book I'm writing about my dad! 🙂
mexorean
Good luck! Acupuncture definitely helps me deal with anxiety as well. Positive vibes headed your way:)