I love looking at beautiful weddings and details just as much as the next girl. However, I feel like some of these events have gotten a bit, how can I say this? Out of hand. The last time I checked, we were real people, not models. I can’t help but look at some of these weddings, and think, wow, those pictures are pretty. But is this a photoshoot or a wedding? I am so busy looking at the perfectly put together details and sweeping landscapes, that I’m missing the geniune feelings of the day that get me all misty-eyed and emotionally involved. It can feel contrived, and as a result, I’m left feeling like I’m skimming through my latest issue of Glamour. Inspiration is fabulous. But is it becoming too much? I know I am being very vague, but it is done on purpose. I don’t want to sit and point my finger at anyone specific. I’m just sharing my overall feelings on this.My advice to future couples: do your best, and put together a day that is the greatest reflection of you and your significant other. You aren’t shooting the next Spring Vogue. You are gettin’ married 🙂 The industry can (intentionally or unintentionally) put that added pressure on us to feel like everything needs to be picture perfect.Just something I’ve been pondering. What do you think? I’d love to hear other opinions on this. 
E @ Oh! Apostrophe
Amen! I feel like this a lot when I look at wedding photos. I also wonder, how long did you spend taking these couple/group photos?!
Amy
I could not agree more. There were times when I felt like my own wedding pics. were inadequate compared to what I'm seeing out there, and then I thought about it. It was my wedding day and we were happy in every picture regardless of the poses we got or didn't have time for. They are of "us" in a very true sense. I felt much better after letting that sink in awhile.
Cheap Wife
OMG…did you read my mind??!!! Did you see Mrs. Beagle's post on weddingbee? I love you for writing this post. I am struggling with looking at all those amazing pictures and feeling let down that I don't have the same "glamour shots". You are so right! And gosh..if I look at my pictures, they may not be the "art" I had hoped for…but they a real and full of emotion. Why have I gotten so twisted and set my standards so high? Maybe from a year of looking at wb and all the blogs. I think my mind and expectations for very twisted. Some of us are not models by nature and some of us couldn't afford to spend TONS of $$ on the most amazing photog ever AND 2nd shooter AND video. I love you for writing this post. Funny how someone can say something that really clicks with you. What you said really "clicked". Ahmen Sister!
Jessebel
This is not the first time I have read this. East Side Bride touched on this topic a while back.
Your feelings are spot on. My wedding has some boo-boos, random moments, and a bit of awkwardness but that's fine cause it was normal. Our favorite pictures are the ones of friends and family – young and old – performing a soul train line during the reception. The evidence, err, pictures are hee-larious. Ironically, the one thing we didn't care too much for were the posed shots. When I told my husband about East Side Bride's post, he had a Eureka! momemt.
I'm all for pretty photos but at some point couple begin to lose sight of the wedding is all about.
Kimberly Michelle
Amen sister! I saw a photo shoot today for a TTD session… and wondered what compels people to need a fashion layout shoot of their own. I really like fun photos, but now it just seems like everyone wants a Martha picture of their event.
With maternity photos… I'm trying to strike a balance between a more photojournalistic style and contemporary fun. And the more I see things that are as you describe, I keep going more and more to the photojournalistic style to make sure I keep it real.
Mo
I just wrote about this! Looking at pretty pictures gets me depressed now, like I'm not living up to a standard, even though I'm supposed to be focusing on the MARRIAGE not the prettiness that surrounds the marriage. Thanks for keeping it real Carly. =)
Kasia Fink
Here, here! What's more, all these beautiful shots make us put unrealistic expectations on ourselves not only for the photo shoot but all the little details too.
I'm with Jessebel – my favorite wedding moments captured on film were the ones where we were goofing off. There were, uh, a lot of those. 😉
Sandy
I definitely share your opinion! I feel like the trendy thing to do is to have wedding pictures that are very posed and styled…and there are AMAZING photographers who are great at setting up those shots and/or photoshopping their images.
Those photos are amazing and beautiful…but it kind of feels phony, forced, and superficial to me. I have gone to weddings and then seen the photos and thought, is this even the same wedding b/c the majority of their photos are the posed ones and the other images are so photoshopped that it's not a very accurate representation of the actual wedding day.
I definitely agree that something gets lost and couples can get caught up in the appearance of a perfect image rather than being genuine and letting the camera document the wedding. I love seeing the photos that captured the spirit of the wedding and all the key moments so it takes you back to the wedding day – and to me that means capturing the real expressions, body language, lighting, etc…even if it's not as perfect/flattering as we hoped it to be…
Kind of like magazines and airbrushing, I think the overstyled and posed wedding photos give people distorted expectations of what their wedding should look like…
Sorry for the rambling response 🙂
thelessthandomesticgoddess
Thank you everyone for your responses! I was perusing a few wedding websites, that shall remain anonymous, and was like, "What the hell? I've got to write a post about what's going on here." I see now that many of my lovely reader friends and fellow bloggers are witnessing this and interpreting it similarly! Down with overly staged and gimmicky wedding pictures, please! 🙂
thelessthandomesticgoddess
@E: Who knows!? Perhaps some people miss their ceremonies on account of taking pictures! 🙂
@Amy: We missed a lot of poses that I had originally been set on getting. I feel the same way as you – happy with what we did capture!
@Cheap Wife: I've got to read Mrs. Beagle's post. Honey, your wedding pics are beautiful and you are beautiful in them! Don't second guess them for a second.
@Jessebel: Got to read the East Side Bride article! Thanks for passing that along. Yay for a family soul train line! 🙂
@Kimberly Michelle: Oooh, your maternity shoot is going to be fabulous – hope you share them!
@Mo: I just saw your newest post. It seems we are on the same page! Your day is going to be so amazing, I just know it!
@Kasia: I love your wedding pictures! So beautiful – and super fun at the same time.
@Sandy: I 100% agree with you. In fact, I had another post written that I never published about the excessive use of Photoshop! Haha!
Cheap Wife
I came home today and went on and on for about 15min about this post/topic to my husband. I wonder how many of our husbands have heard all about fellow bloggers and posts. hahaha!!!
Linda
I couldn't agree more! Too many weddings are looking like they should belong in magazines, and I'm sorry, but that doesn't feel like real life!
Erin
So very true. Sometime between 1980 and 2000 the entire industry changed, the Internet became mainstream to see what everyone else was doing, and suddenly the need to throw a lavish event and compete with other brides came to be the status quo. I can say with confidence most of my friends parents had cake and punch receptions with some dancing that likely ended around 4 p.m. It wasn't days of activities nor the elaborate affair it has become, with the idea that it *might* be the caliber for a magazine feature.
Katie
my husband reminded me of this towards the end of our wedding day when the pictures started to get too much for him.
I'm so glad that my photos still show the joy of the day and realize that all those 'glamour' shots aren't the most important to me!
Wifey Wiferson
I agree that the focus should be enjoying the day and not on getting great photos…however, I do want really great photos! Sometimes I see great wedding pics that are clearly posed and I think to myself, wow, what a great piece of artwork! I would totally hang that up! I think there needs to be a happy balence. One could have a very simple wedding with fantastic and artistic pictures at the same time. (Haven't gotten mine back yet, but that is what I'm crossing my fingers for.)
Penny
Oh my gosh, I TOTALLY agree. It drives me insane. Weddings have become SUCH a business. It's like people are setting up some sort of business that requires glossy marketing. I can't stand it. More and more I appreciate my parents' wedding pictures, taken by friends at their 25 person mountain wedding – everyone looks happy and in love and it's genuine. I think are wedding are a huge craft project until you've planned one,a nd you realize that all of the "over-producing" and detail management was misdirection.
honey my heart
this is an amazing post and a wonderful point of view. having just received my pro photos, i was hoping for everything to look 'perfect' and through the smiles of everyone, the way we looked at each other, those we surrounded ourselves with, the little details that made us us, our wedding was not magazine/popular/glamorously perfect, but perfectly us.