I have unsubscribed from most wedding blogs, but a few have slipped through the cracks. It was during a late night session of mindless internet perusing when I happened upon a wedding blog, and committed a big sin. The sin of coveting thy neighbor’s wedding (when my wedding was said and done a long time ago).
The pictures did a better job of telling the day’s story. The details that got flubbed up on our big day were executed flawlessly. It looked like a cleaner, more put together version of our big day. Hell, it was even thrown at our venue!
However, my feelings ran a little deeper than jealousy over some stranger’s wedding pictures. This wedding reminded me of our wedding, and I got a little sad that it was all over.
In the beginning, I was elated when the big event had passed. I think I did a cartwheel for every day that I didn’t have to organize details, talk about flowers, or worry about guest lists.
Now I am much more removed from it all. I have discovered there is still a little wedding troll living inside of me that lurks around corners stealing glances of gorgeous center pieces, and sighing over pretty wedding gowns. I guess when I saw those flawless pictures, I had a moment of clarity, and realized that I haven’t allowed myself to connect with the fact that…
I miss planning my wedding!
It is something that I never thought would happen. And I think I have been in denial about it.
I will probably never plan an event of such magnitude and importance again, and weddings will always evoke happy feelings for me; the days of writing posts for Weddingbee, dreams for the day, the overall giddiness, and the wonder of what this marriage thing would be like.
Man, I miss those days.
I do feel like I have moved on with my life, but I will always have a special place in my heart for the memories of planning our wedding.
Do you ever miss wedding planning? Or is it completely out of your system? Give it some time, you might surprise yourself!